A Vay-cay Update

We've been on a little vay-cay for the last few days, so as you can imagine my food choices are limited. I've also eaten out more in the last week than I have the whole year.....VACATION! Remember when eating out used to be fun? Not so much anymore.

Anyway, we're also at a house with a full length mirror. OH THE SHOCK AND HORROR! No, I am not talking about stretch marks on my abdomen either, they're actually looking fairly good, all things considered. No, no, no, it's me. I'm fat and I'm tired of being fat. So, I guess the good feelings of being in a smaller size of fat pants are officially gone.

I really need to get back on program and really get serious about my weight. I have a mental wall though. How do I get past this? Any ideas? I really want to get down to my prepregnancy weight. Does anyone have a magic wand I can borrow? hehe.

Anyway, on this trip, I've made some decisions about my life and lifestyle. I'm going to be implementing them when I get home. I just hope I can find that mental push to make it happen.

Chicken's New Clothes

Found the scale. It was under the TV shelf in our room. DH put it under there so the baby wouldn't chew on it. But that's his favorite thing to chew on right now, so I don't care, if it gives me 5 mins to get dressed in peace. Chew away!

DH pumped up the stroller tires....oh, that was nice.

Down to 207#s this morning, again.

I think I've lost more inches than weight, which is totally ok, since the number on the scale is not my only measure of success. Yesterday I was pressed for time and needed a clean shirt quickly. I pulled out one of my medium shirts and it fit. It didn't fit three months ago. So, now I feel like I have a bunch of new clothes, but with out spending the money for new clothes.

And I seem to be winning the war on desire. I have not had a treat in two days, and I'm ok with that!

Will Power

Another week has past. Thankfuly I was able to maintain my weight...despite the lack of excercise.

For whatever reason I can't do excercise videos, I have to be outside for it. Last week it was cold and rainy most days, too cold to be outside with a baby.

Right now the sun is shining and it looks to be a warm one! So out and about we'll go.

The other good thing is that I am down a pant size and a shirt size. My new Lane Bryant size 4 jeans, which I think are some where between a regular 18 and 20, are too big, even right out of the dryer. I fit comfortably in my old size 18 Lane Bryant jeans and a regular, not misses sized XL shirts.

This week the challenge is to plan some healthy meals and eat healthy snacks. I have all the ingredients, now all I need is the magic ingredient...WILL POWER!

Welcome 2009

Happy New Year and happy back on the wagon for me.

Baby was born on Nov 25th, 2008 a week an a half before his due date. I ended up gaining 45lbs over the course of the pregnancy. It was more than I wanted but, what can you do? You can't stop gaining weight, I just knew I'd have to work harder when the time preseneted itself.

And the time has presented itself and here I am. I am the same weight 220lbs I was when I stared WW, two years ago. However, I am proportioned a bit differently...go figure??!! My lower half is bigger than my upper half and so up until this week I'd still been wearing my maternitly pants. And yes it was totally bugging me too. I finally got out and into town and to the fat lady store for some new fat pants. I found that my old fat pants all look like just that, old and was not ok with that.

So, new fat pants in hand, here I go.

I started my WW diet on Monday. So far, w/o excercising I've lost 2lbs. Granted I have been hungry and it's been hard to not eat whenever and whatever, but I know I can get thru it. I have to get myself out of prenancy mode. I will say this about being pregnant. I did not like it, except for the fac that I didn't have to worry about food. That was nice.

Yesterday (Friday) my DH was home and I was able to get out and walk for the first time in 9 months too! How great it was! How out of shape I am! Anyway, it will take time to work back up to where I was, and I won't be able to go out with Baby till it warms up a bit, but I am hopefull. Right now, I have some walk at home DVDs and a thigh master thingy to do at home on the week days, and I will add that next week.

Bit by bit...here I go again. Hopefully, I will fit into my regular clothes by summer!

The fat is back

The trip to Utah was not as diet damaging as I thought it would be. I managed to only put on .5#--which given the accuracy of my scale may or may not be true.

Thursday morning I awoke early and headed down to the fitness center of our hotel. I suggest that if you can, always stay in a Marriott...they are wonderful. I was remineded as I walked to nowhere on the treadmill, why I hate tread mills and all excercise equipment in general. BORING! In the end I really didn't need to bother. Both days of the conference I ended up walking all over the campus of BYU--at least 2 miles from one end to the other. I will say this, I did have the beginings of shin splints--walking in dress flats is not so comfortable. It kind of reminded me of my mission in Bulgaria, that and the fact that it was snowing too! But I had no complaints about either of these things...I was just happy to be there.

So, this week it's back to life and reality. I'm going to focus in on my excercise and my food choices. I want to be in a size 16 pant by the end of May. I am also thankful to have had the chance to shop for clothes in Utah. There were modest choices abounding, although I have to say that I hate the knee lenghth and mid-calf lenght hems of most dresses and skirts. I also think that the re-surgent early 80s styles are gaggy! At least I found t-shirts with sleeves though!

Chicken Fat is back in the neighborhood!

The tale of a pear shapped woman.

This last week...wekk 13 was very good. I dropped 2 pounds by mid week, then stopped. I have still got to figure out how to make the losses last all week.

In celebration of my loss, and breaking back into the 100s again, I bought myself some new work out clothes. I've never been one for matching things, or the latest and greatest track suit, but the clothes I have been excercising in are too big. I had originally gone into Target for new white t-hirts for this summer. I came out with those, and new work out pants, and socks. Then in a random find at Sams Reeboks were on sale. New shoes could not have come at a better time. My old Spaldings, which I have been using for the last 6 months are offically dead. No cusion, no more support, they were killing my legs. So after precariously balancing the middle of the isle at Sams, trying on the shoes, I bought them too.

It also seems that my top is smaller than my bottom. This is the life of a pear shaped woman. Most of my old tops, blouses and such fit again!! Hooray! However, their pals the skirts don't quite fit. It seems that in my slow weight gain, most of it ended up on my thighs. Seriously, I give 'thunder thighs' new meaning. There is only one remedy....Buns of Steel for strenght training. I've actually been mullling over this for a while. I hate doing DVDs, but I think I need to to get rid of the saddle bags that are my thighs and butt.

So last night as I was doing the monthly closet fashion show, my husband kept saying, "You haven't worn that in a while." "Ya, I've been too fat." I've been too fat for too long. But I did discover my waist again...HI FRIEND! He also kept saying, "How long has it been since you've been able to wear that top?" I don't know when the last time I was able to wear any of my clothes was. I'll guess 2004, before I went to work at Satan's High School and before I lost 2 pregnancies. 2004 to the end of 2006 is a big haze in my memory.

So we plod on this week, as every week for the past 13. Here's to you 14, and here's hoping my thunder thighs, and pear shaped body find more favorable weather or a salad shooter, which ever would be fine.

Gettin' Skinny with it-YO!

Anyway...here's the skinny--get it skinny! Ha! I really have to quit making bad jokes.

Really, today's weigh in tells me I'm down 16 pounds from my starting point, which will still remain a mystery to everyone out there. I am shrinking, even if the numbers on the scale are not (well, not as fast as I would like), which is still progress. It's just those darn Girl Scout Cookies which are killing me. I ordered my usual boat load in January before I went on WW. Now it's March, I'm in the middle of WW and the cookies came--very bad grasshopper, very bad. I can't just throw them away either so I will just have to limit my intake.

Yesterday when I was getting dressed, my husband commented that I was really looking better. I asked him, if he didn't know how much weight I've lost, how much would you say I've lost? He said about 20 lbs. Good! I'm getting there--slowly but surely.

Not-so-fat, Fat-pants

Anyway....the really fat pants I've been wearing for a long time time, are almost too big. I will have to dig thru my closet to find my not-so-fat-fat-pants soon. I'm down 13lbs as of this morning and my appetite is shrinking faster than a Wicked Witch in a bath tub. All of this is good considering that last week, I felt like a prisoner with all the Valentines day crap floating around.

Fat Lady tired of singing--can you help?

They say when you turn 30 things start to change (who are "they" anyway, and why do "they": seem to have so much sway over all of us????). On my 30th birthday and shortly there after, I didn't really believe the notion 'that things would change' to be true. But then things started to change---grey hair, wrinkles, using large ammounts of Oil of Olay, having to be in bed and sleeping by 10PM, an overwhelming dislike of teenagers, and a little more of me to love. That's what brings me here today, the fact that this fat lady is tired of singing. I'm an emotional eater, and weight has always been an issue with me.

I go by the moniker East of Eden (to protect the innocet you know), I'm a 33 year old burned out high school teacher, turned Haus-frau living in Northern New Mexico. My chubby secrets read like a really sad novel. But none of you are allowed to feel sorry for me, I do that enough on my own. (It's my party, I can cry if I want to!!)

A little over two years ago--almost three years really, I picked up my teaching hat again, and began a job teaching history to 10th and 11th graders at what I like to call "Satan's High School." I kid you not, it was that bad. Normally when I teach I would loose weight. Not this time around. I found myself coming home from horrible days with the legions of the devil and putting anything in my mouth for comfort. The day I was reaching for a big spoon and the jar of mayonaise (well maybe not that, but you get the picture) I stopped myself and had a major revelation about myself. It was then and there that I knew I was an emotional eater and I had to do something. Despite my new found knowledge, I did not have the actual desire to DO anything about the junk in my trunk. And I kept on loading the junk in.

Fast forward to a little under two years ago, the summer of 2005. I'd quit my job teaching with the hopes that me and the Spouse could try and start our family. I found myself pregnant and then loosing two prenancies in the space of about five months. (that was the part you're not supposed to feel sorry for me). If I thought teaching with the spawn of Satan was bad, being thrust into the deep dark hell that is pregnancy loss, post-partum depression and grief was much worse. For most of 2006 I found myself wandering aimlessly in a fog of misery and tins of Danish Butter Cookies as I healed from these experiences. As this last holiday approached I wondered how I was doing, deep down inside and I could feel the fog lifting. For the first time in a long time I felt like myself again, and I had the desire to DO something.

Aside from the junk in my trunk, I have ever higher blood pressure. I know the dangers of high blood pressure from family experience, and from watching way too many Discovery Channel specials on the subject. I also know that being overweight while pregnant brings many health problems and challenges, that I just don't have the constitution to deal with. So as you can see, my reasons for wanting to lose weight are many.

So what am I doing?

This week my Weight Watchers home kit came in the mail. It's great, with an explanation of how both of their programs work, cookbooks, meal plans, points calculator and excercies DVD. Whoooo-who! I'm still plowing thru all of it, but so far, I've decided to go with the "Flex-plan". How that works is I get a set number of food points each day. When I eat I lose points, but when I excercise I gain points. I'm trying to figure out an excercise plan I can do indoors in the winter that won't kill me. (Our town didn't get the memo on global warming this year--it's stinkin' cold!!) I'm exited to count points--look at me I've become a bean counter!! I don't have to buy weird food on WW or eat tofu--which would kill me, or weird things from the rain forest; and I can eat out, if we happen to be out. I know myself well enough that with this plan I can re-gain control of my self and reign in my bad habits. Re-direction of behavior is what I'm about now. I also know that thru lots of prayer, serious contemplation and help from you all, my Husband and God, I can reign in my bad habits and emotions and get my body back.

Now if you think I'm actually going to say how big of a lard I am, you need mental help....haha...maybe I do too! I will say this, my goal is to loose 10% of my body weight by the end of March. After that I will re-evaluate my life, look for me on Dr. Phil--ha! The ultimate goal is to fit back into my size 14 clothes, I actually don't care how much I weigh, but if I can fit into that closet of cute clothes I will be a happy camper.